I think the thing people don’t realize with that bullshit “well not all guys are dangerous, you should give them a chance” or what the fuck ever is like
if i had a plate of cookies and i was like yeah, a few of them have laxatives in them and one’s got cyanide in there, BUT THEY’RE NOT ALL LIKE THAT
you’re probably not gonna take a fucking cookie
I can’t breathe. This is so accurate.
me at home:
i've been wearing the same jeans and band shirt for the last three weeks but it still smells alright so i'll keep wearing it
me going away:
I NEED ONE SHIRT FOR EACH DAY AND EXTRA IN CASE IT GETS DIRTY AND THE SAME AMOUNT OF JEANS AND SOCKS ACTUALLY NO I'LL NEED EXTRA SOCKS IN CASE IT FLOODS AND DOUBLE THE UNDERWEAR IN CASE OF DISASTER AND ONE NICE OUTFIT IN CASE I GET INVITED TO TEA WITH THE QUEEN
If I dont respond to your insult it means what i wanted to say was too mean and I decided to let you live
*two girls kiss*
straight people: i just think it’s so amazing that they would do that, you know. as friends
*two girls have sex*
straight people: female friendship is amazing
*two girls get married, buy a house, have some kids*
straight people: what better way to grow old than to do it with your best friend
Literally no one thinks this
- cara delevigne and michelle rodriguez being called ‘gal pals’ (they’re dating)
- ellie and riley’s kiss in the last of us: left behind labeled as ‘platonic’
- "I did a picture in my Basic Illustration class once of my new lesbian couple characters. They weren’t doing anything in the picture aside from looking exasperated at one another, but I CLEARLY stated to the teacher repeatedly that they were a couple (we were discussing how to show relationships between characters via props, expressions, etc.) However, without fail, every single time he mentioned the characters he called them “sisters”. It annoyed the fucking crap out of me." (x)
- "Ugh. Ugh. I can’t even count the number of times my girlfriend has been reduced to my best friend while fully knowing the situation, instead choosing to acknowledge it the way that their warped minds see fit. fuck." (x)
- "This is 100% true. “So, how’s your friend?” “Fiancée” “Yeah, friend, how’s your friend?” “…”" (x)
- “The way that this is worded is hilarious to me because my great aunt actually bought a horse, raised kids, and has lived with the same woman for 30 years, and the majority of my family still refers to them as “good friends”.” (x)
- "There’s this guy at the 7/11 that is down the street from us that ALWAYS asks where my “good friend” is. I correct him every time and say “you mean my wife?” He just nods.
One time after I corrected him he said “so she’s wife, does that make you husband?”
I looked at him like he was utterly stupid and said “no. We’re both girls. I’m her wife.”
I just uuuugh. Fucker.
The next time he asks about my “good friend” I intend to just go off on him and refuse to step foot in that 7/11 again.” (x)
just a few of the many
"literally no one"